BBC Radio 2 has announced a major shake-up of its morning schedule after Breakfast Show starlet Chris 'Likeable' Evans was sensationally kidnapped by pirate radio station Virgin.
BBC's head of radio light entertainment Terry Watt explained the new approach:
'Starting tomorrow, we will no longer be broadcasting our tired, old breakfast show. We need to bring in something new and exciting that will attract the trendy kids. With that in mind, the breakfast show will be replaced with Jeremy Corbyn's Israel Hour. We expect ratings to go through the roof!